me as a pizza

okay, I love to do these tests, but I rarely wanna post them.... but this one is surprisingly accurate. I would have ordered this already if I'd known it existed.

Meatball Pizza

Unusual and uncompromising. You're usually the first to discover a new trend. You appreciate a good meal and good company. You're an interesting blend of traditional and modern.

What's Your Pizza Personality?

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ps-I was oreo cookie ice cream too, cookie!


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story about my grandfather

I don't know why this story popped into my head right now, but anyway, it illustrates that there are executives and then there are executives....

my grandfather used to be a big management exec. he had a driver and one time they were in manhattan, up from philly for a couple of days. in the morning at breakfast, my grandfather asked his driver how his room was. so it came out that the company was putting the driver up in a real dive on 42nd st (before the disneyfication, of course). so my grandfather asks for a telephone and calls down to philly and starts pitching a fit about how he can't find his driver, and the hotel staff doesn't know anything. when they admit they'll have to track him down across town, my grandfather insists that from then on, his driver stays at the same place he does. and so it was.....

pretty cool.

yelling at old people

I'm looking forward to my trip to Toronto at the end of the week for the usual reasons (yoga! -ahhhhh and fressen! -mmmmmm) but there is one part of the trip that I'm not really looking forward to - the upcoming visit to the rest-stop. for most people, this might be bad cause the bathrooms are dirty or something, but I have nothing against the canadian bathrooms (except that they call them washrooms) and I always enjoyed getting out of the car and grabbing some coffee and a donut or some fries, until... well... I started yelling at old people.

I mean, just one old person. so that's not so bad, right? actually, I didn't even yell at her, but she was old. and I did scold her, and I felt terribly about it afterward.

the reason was, she was totally bitching about the service at the Wendy's whose line we were in, and the service was fine. she was just a crabby, mean person, between bossing her friend (who was at least as ancient as her) to go check the lines at the other restaurant and making comments about the people who worked at the Wendy's. and the worst part was, she had some like 10-year-old grandson with her, and he looked like a pretty good kid. so that's some education, gramma!

I always thought growing up in the city means you can ignore anything, but she was so f-ing acid, after about 5 minutes I couldn't even take it anymore and said "well if you think the line is too slow here, why don't you try at the other place," and pointed out how rude she was being. I wasn't surprised that she tried to turn it around and said "well you are rude to say that to me."

so I said real patient and calm like I was explaining to one of my little elementary students: "no, you are being rude."

well, she apologized after that and (even better) shut up. and when I left the line with my order, a few people still in line gave me the thumbs-up or the 'meaningful smile' (which means a thumbs-up). but I still felt awful.

after all, she was old. plus, let's be honest, I just can't take conflict. even if I win.

I'm really afraid what I might do if some codger in front of me takes to long to choose a donut.

*shiver* I am pure evil.

oh my god! Jenna Elfman was on the radio being interviewed this morning and... she's a scientologist!?! I swear something really turns off in my brain when I hear that. so now, I lost another actor/actress to watch because I just can't be bothered with them anymore.

creep me out! dad, I guess I vote for Tea Leoni to play tha lorider in the TV movie of my life after all...

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and then after the interview they said Beck is, too! maybe I knew that one already. anyway, ??!!??!!!!!


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"I was sure he would screw it up"

yahoo! two great pieces of news for the social register today - numero uno is my step-sister is a first-time auntie!! her younger brother had a baby girl. both mother and daughter are resting and doing well!!

**** and Numero Dos (drumroll), also from this week, my friend Marie got engaged!! congratulations to the happy couple!! ****

I can assure you, the title of this post sounds even funnier in a french accent :) but her fiance, Aaron (oooooohhhhhhhh!) managed to surprise her in a very romantic fashion. way to go, Aaron!!!

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ps - sorry, Marie, I couldn't resist quoting you!! hahahaha!


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hurry, cookie!

you better get over here to detroit before all the delapidation is gone!

in other news..... I'd actually like to see this idol off-shoot, hopefully someone will load clips in the inter-tron.



random image:

LOTF

aside: hmmmm, I had to reconsider whether to post this after witnessing the recent change of venue of a co-blogspotter (and yet he lands on his feet - I can't believe such a great address wasn't taken! kudos, tf) well, I've altered this subtly ... just in case...:

watch out! in another overly-hyped media production, you will soon be watching a three-hour saga about the WAR OF THE FORKS! here is the rough outline of my screenplay, which will be told as a voiceover from the journal of an aspiring war-correspondant:

WAR OF THE FORKS (Episode I)
tagline: "nobody panic and no one will get hurt!"

dateline- 10:30 last tuesday: I think it is the nature of a large office for forks to disappear little by little, but our housekeeper decided to take this personally for some reason. he's been hoarding forks in the storage room, letting us eat off of spoons and occasionally, strangely-shaped airline forks when they turn up. as the vips here don't eat lunch with us peons, he's been getting away with this strange behavior. until..... today....... a very, very vip at our office went to get a fork for her salad and lo and behold, she had to eat with a funny-shaped fork!!!!!! the evil, but misunderstood peon got blasted. she is a very, very vip who likes to have a well-shaped selection of forks at her disposal.

dateline - yesterday afternoon:well, poor mr. hk didn't mend his foolish ways, but just shifted a few forks from here to there. he got reamed out again, only this time by a very sweet admin person who honestly, I've only heard her raise her voice one other time. well, mr. hk must have been so hurt by this he lost his mind entirely........

dateline - today about 5 minutes ago: I just looked in the drawer and the entire silverware tray was covered in a mountain of forks, forks!..... forks of every shape and size. he must have had these all along, but I don't see how not letting us use them was solving the problem? plus, our very, very vip ("how do you think I got so rich?") don't like too little or too much forks! if she happens to open the drawer, my friends, there is going to be more drama!

segue to Episode II: I tremble, I shiver..... I fear I may soon witness first-ever firing over forks!!

wednesdays with lord chesterfield

"Be wiser than other people if you can, but do not tell them so."
Lord Chesterfield


actually, this is my blogger-code, I..... oops.

hello?

seriously, brits don't know what this is?

test!: your movie aptitude

♪ One of these things is not like the others,
One of these things just doesn't belong,
Can you tell which thing is not like the others
By the time I finish my song? ♪

-Star Wars Episode 3
-War of the Worlds
-Stage Beauty
-Tony Takitani

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want to see some great photography? then check out this guy's website

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happy weekend to me!

oh yeah, I just decided what I'm gonna do this weekend: NOTHING!

hell yeah! movies, and maybe clean the house a bit, and sleep. legally blonde, here I come! again!

it's still my birthday week so read this and love it!

thanks, anonymous coworker for reminding us all of the rap song like whoa, cause I was having trouble making rhymes for this. I've been working on it for a week. it's an:

ODE TO MY LIP GLOSS

It smells like honey (I am the baddest mf in the room!)
It's shiny and shimmery with a tinsy bit of pink (I am the baddest mf in the room!)
Gives me something to do at work because it must be reapplied regularly (I am the baddest mf in the room!)
But not too regularly (I am the baddest mf in the room!)
Actually leaves my lips in pretty good shape, moisture-wise (I am the baddest mf in the room!)
You can get it at the drugstore (I am the baddest mf in the room!)
It's by bonne bell (you know you love bonne bell!) (I am the baddest mf in the room!)

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I really am a great writer!


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question for you drug-lords who read my blog

"But at 0830 GMT on Friday, a man on a train called in to say he might have been hallucinating, but he had just seen a whale in the Thames." -BBC

I don't know that much about hallucinogens, but don't you know when you might be hallucinating?
(and then don't you not call a government office and offer the info?)

internet dating update!

okay, maybe the exclamation point is unwarranted. just wanted to point out that the hallowed match.com, on a cursory search, has the same exact bozos that were on my last service, as I suspected. so am I gonna shell out money to them... prob not.

cooking classes, here I come. *sigh*

in another internet dealy, some 'friends' were 'pressuring me' to 'use' myspace.com. I thought this was a ploy to make me meet 'hot' guys they had stumbled over on the information superhighway sidewalk, but actually, there was a b-day message for me on there! wahoo!!!!!!!!!!!

synchronicity

oh man, all I am good for is sleeping this week.
the end.


UPDATE: okay, the reason why this post is called sychronicity, but I was tired to type this all, is that it seems like everybody was tired/under the weather/blue/? over the last week. is there something to this? listeners, please call in. Friday 13th? full moon? what were your experiences?

cowboy story part deux

oh crap, I just looked at my stats and the numbers are way up - you must all be looking for the end of the story! here you go:

over the low croaking of the frogs, they heard billy's phone ringing back at the house. he excused himself and willy crouched down by the water, listening to the frogs and thinking long thoughts. about 5 min later, billy came back and said that it was the new tenants over at his folk's place calling, they'd come across a set of antique glass bottles in the back of the barn.

"I told em that was your collection, will," said billy. "member you kept em there to hide em from lattie? I never thought they were that old, though."

"shit," said willy. "I don't want em anymore."

"they said they're worth about 300 bucks. they wanta put em in their kitchen. they'll pay you for em."

"pretty straight of em." (ironic use of the word straight)

so that's how willy got the money to put in a frog pond up at his new place. his nephews loved getting muddy in it, which lattie hated and so willy had a new reason to enjoy the pond and, you know? willy and billy realized that they had a few fond old memories in common and they took to grabbing a beer together at JJ's bar when willy came to town.

after all, new friends are silver but old are gold.

the end

Re: Fwd: All drugs containing PHENYLPROPANOLAMINE are being recalled

strangely, this is the tile of one of the more personal and heartwarming e-mails I've received lately. anyhoo, watch out for that phenylpropanolamine. (I already knew it was dangerous cause it has the letters "nola" in it. that's god's way of warning us he's mad at us.)

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as a big-time sammich fan, I ask you to join me in a moment of holy and solemn celebration on the 228th anniversary of the (European) discovery of the Sandwich Islands!


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story time

hi folkses. I decided to write you all a story.

once upon a time.

there were two gay cowboys who grew up as neighbors out in the west. they were okay friends growing up, but they didn't really take to each other even just as friends, and that was too bad according to those family members who were a little more aware. they had figured if the two paired up it would work out nicely. funny how families always have their great ideas.

cowboy a call him willy bought a little farm when he'd saved enough. the thing about it was the frog pond out back. more of a pond, but there were a lot of frogs. willy took to strolling out back in the evenings and listening to the frogs. damn, he loved that frog-pond. in the summers it seemed like that was the best thing about his day, hearing those frogs and smelling the night air.

one day, he decided to sell his place so he could move nearer to his sister and be close as the brats came up. so he looked around for a buyer and what do you know, cowboy b or billy as he was known was the interested party. they came to an agreement and willy packed up and moved away.

now billy was not so much of a nature guy, even though he was a cowboy. he took all that natural stuff for granted or as a kind of background noise and didn't give a shit. as a matter of fact, he thought the frogs were kind of noisy and thought idly about filling in the pond every now and again. (don't worry, he's not really going to.) but one day willy came back.

he stopped over to the farm and asked billy was everything okay and all that. and billy said yeah and so forth. they bullshitted a bit but really willy wanted to get back to that frog pond. so before long he asked billy if he could stroll back and see the pond. "you see, I always did like to listen to those frogs a-belchin." billy said fine and they walked back.


well, I'm tired of writing now, so I'll finish it up tomorrow. you can guess how you think it'll end in the comments, if you want.

b-day bonanza!

thanks to everyone who made my birthday so special!!! you know who you are! (let's just say: belgian food, japanese food and a dessert buffet! yeah! -n' kabuki, yeah!) and thanks for the well-wishes from all youz on the Inter-Connect!!! :)


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I am feeling old. but a little less old, due to all the well-wishes... now I get why birthday celebrations were invented.


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smartys you know who you are!

now I'm going to call out the smarty-pantses who gave me gag gifts for my birthday! (MY BIRTHDAY THE HOLIEST DAY OF THE YEAR !)

-BRITEW! she wrapped up a book that I HAD LENT HER !
-bedhead: seriously, "travel-size condiments?" this suspiciously seems like the stuff that is given out for free at the drive-through! let's not even get into the choco Santa!
-mom: she wrapped her used George Foreman grill that she told me three months ago she was gonna give me.

why me, god, why me?

ps I gave my lil bro the book of cool ! he loved it!