guerilla blogger

I just saw the movie Unknown White Male. it's a documentary about a guy who got total amnesia. it started me thinking about like what I would want to do if I had just total open horizons about me. I certainly haven't thought about my life like that in a while... I've been so focused on like this job I have now, teaching, and all I have to learn to keep it, the stress as I've been under the gun of being laid-off while watching co-workers get their notices, then being assigned to a new building abruptly, how to deal with all the coworkers, some of whom are big back-stabbers and all the money I'm owing now for when I was in school and how I can never go on a holiday now or do just whatever I feel like day-to-day or even hour-to-hour, cause all the responsibilities... it's not like I regret getting my teaching degree, but it was certainly a lot more fun when I was just a sub. The stress is getting to me ... - some days I feel like I'm just treading water, barely... short-tempered and etc really. I keep making lists of things I could do to de-stress. today I added 'go tanning'... I love the smell of the lotion. okay, I feel better now.

so anyway back to the first topic, I came up with:

-learn to do aerial acrobat stuff
-go up in hot air balloons alot
-spend time with elephants
-make art
-travel in France/drink wine
-there was another one but I've forgotten it already! ohno! early onset of amnesia!!!!?????!!!!!!

anyway, I'd hate to lose/but not lose all my oldest friends like this guy did. they all didn't really know how to relate to each other anymore, and I'd miss our phone convo's brainon, esp. you shouting obcenities in spanish in the background, anon....................

so anyway, hi everybody - I miss you and I hope I get an internet connection soon......